Military intelligence

The twenty first century. The military might want to shut it all down; in the name of freedom, of course.

"GPS cell phone service could be used by our adversaries for travel plans, surveillance and targeting,"

said a draft report by the 304th Military Intelligence Battalion, posted on the website of the Federation of American Scientists (FAS). No more maps at gas stations folks, and I had better go back to using a sextant on my boat lest somebody hijacks it and uses it to terrorize the Florida coast.

"Twitter has also become a social activism tool for socialists, human rights groups, communists, vegetarians, anarchists, religious communities, atheists, political enthusiasts, hacktivists and others to communicate with each other and to send messages to broader audiences,"

Damn those vegetarian devils!

"Twitter is already used by some members to post and/or support extremist ideologies and perspectives,"

and aren't those Republicans good at it?

"Terrorists could theoretically use Twitter social networking in the US as an operation tool,"

and the same thing goes for postcards and telephones and semaphore signals! Who knows what those boy scouts are talking about? Don't they have training camps or something like that?

"Terrorists may or may not be using voice-changing software but it should be of open source interest that online terrorist and/or terrorist enthusiasts are discussing it,"

said the Generals, and if the price of goats is being discussed in Pakistan, we need to get the flock out of there.