"Zoom from zero to 60 mph with the force of a supersonic F-14, take in high-speed loops and turns synchronized to a specially recorded Aerosmith soundtrack and zip through Tinseltown in the biggest, loudest limo you've ever seen."
That’s option one. Option two is that you die. You may well have some heart condition that you don’t know about or that is minor enough that you would have a normal life expectancy if you didn’t zip through tinseltown in the biggest, loudest limo you've ever seen. It’s hard to tell how many people die on these rides – the stories don’t get much exposure. The story of 12 year old Michael Russell may be an exception. The daughter of a friend of mine met a similar fate a few years ago and he says the Disney folks were busy telling the press how it wasn’t their fault before the body was cold. She was a grown woman and left two children. The family was told it was her own fault for not being fit enough for fun and that’s the story that ran in the press.
Disney has deals with Florida so that they can inspect their own equipment and they certainly can afford better lawyers and politicians than you or I can, so if they have to pull your cold dead body out of some cute ride with pictures of Mickey on it, your family will likely be up the creek. Somewhere and somehow, you will have had some defect.
"Walt Disney World engineers and ride system engineers completed a thorough inspection of the attraction overnight and found it to be operating properly," said Disney World spokeswoman Kim Prunty. I’m sure it is and I’m sure that it will still kill people who had no idea they shouldn’t be doing aerobatics in an F-14.
I don’t know that the Russells will receive a settlement or if it will be adequate to make them forget the horror of trying to revive a dead child during what was advertised as a day of fun and children cavorting with fictional rodents. I don’t imagine however that the ride will now have a sign saying “you may feel fine now, but in 5 minutes you may be dead” over the entrance; bad for business, after all.
So if you want to experience the acceleration of the F-14, perhaps you ought to be as dead certain of your fitness for the experience as the Navy is and if you aren’t, like most of us, Top Gun Material – try taking the kids to a ball game instead.
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3 comments:
"try taking the kids to a ball game instead."
Can't I just watch it on t.v.? HD and all.
Hey,
If people continue to support GW, they'll continue to get on that ride. Because it's always the victim's fault. Don't forget the talking points.
My wife suffered a stroke on this coaster - occurred as she was getting off the ride. Doctors all say she is perfectly healthy, and there was no cause for the stroke other than the coaster's effects. I believe Disney is handling us well, but I am curious how many of these cases there are - and are never publicized. The hospital says MANY, and has told Disney. The warning should be beefed up a little.
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